AN APPROPRIATE BICYCLE - Pt. 24: 'BEHOLD MY CHART OF ACCOUNTS'

 

 

Some people despise cyclists, or least that’s what they say. Others maintain that it’s only certain cyclists they don’t like – namely, the ones who wear Lycra (as if it’s okay to abhor some cyclists but not others on the basis of what they wear). Do people really think like that? It might just be the Media, pitching the yob in his/her white van against the snob on his/her bike: a class war played out on our roads where the unreconstructed working “man” goes up against the middle class hobbyist. Having no particular affiliation with either hierarchical faction, I’ve hitherto been able to observe this supposed conflict quite dispassionately. I’ve tried to keep right out of it. However, my increasingly severe attire makes this more and more difficult, and the perception could be that I’m now down with the bourgeoisie.

I am polite as I can be towards the responsible motorist, but won’t hesitate in hurling vituperation toward the cyclist who considers it beyond them to indicate. A failure to indicate is a very dangerous thing regardless of the nature of the vehicle intending to turn, although I think it should be noted that the motorist’s negligence has a potentially more devastating impact than the cyclist’s. Still, one group doesn’t seem to flout the rules any more or less than the other, and if there is much antipathy amongst those who share the road then one would be wise to perceive it evenly. (In my opinion, the most dangerous obstacle from a cyclist’s point of view is actually the pedestrian, but I’ve dwelt as long as I want to on the subject of road safety; I’m more concerned with the characteristics of my fellow cyclists, whether we share common traits and if I should be offering my support.)

I decided that it might be fun to use some sort of cycling computer to gauge my speed, distance travelled, and all that malarkey. I don’t think this sort of stuff should be considered mandatory for one to enjoy cycling to the full, but I must admit to revelling in the statistics Wenborn collated from his Garmin after we’d cycled to Box Hill and back (averaging a speed of just over 17 mph, for instance).

About a week prior to ordering the Foster Grant glasses, I stopped off to study eyewear in a cycling dealership west of Kingston, and wish I hadn’t bothered. All the glasses sold by said dealership are kept under lock and key, so I had to request access from whoever could permit me access. Some lugubrious middle-aged man was tasked with the job and I wondered if his dour façade reflected genuine tragedy. The glasses did not suit regardless.

I had not thought much about this particular incident and have since returned to the Cycling Dealership West of Kingston to analyse helmets (and was then offered more friendly female led assistance). Out of convenience, and also by way of thanks for unwittingly allowing me to conduct research in their store, I returned to The Cycling Dealership West of Kingston with an intent to buy the Cateye Strada 8 – a wired computer capable of recording current speed, maximum speed, average speed, total distance travelled, trip distance, second trip distance, and elapsed time. Among its other features are a programmable odometer, auto stop/start function, pace arrow and an auto power-saving mode. It retails at the CDWoK for £26.99, which I’m given to understanding is perfectly reasonable for something of this specification. (I always assume that the CDWoK charge above the market rate, but their pricing policy tends to be quite fair.)

I was concerned as to whether the Cateye Strada 8 could be securely attached to my quill stem for I am pushed for space along my handlebars, and the quill stems are not shaped like threadless stems whose parallel dimensions are more conducive to the mounting of accessories. I asked for advice and got it. The marginally less lugubrious gentleman who served me thought it would probably work, but I elicited from him his permission to return the goods if I found them to be incompatible.

I might have been able to make it work but I fancy the threaded Cateye Strada flex-tight clamp would have been placed under some duress. That aside, the computer itself did not appear to slide in and out of its mounting bracket the way it’s designed to. I couldn’t get it to connect at all, in fact, so returned to return the goods that I had been assured were returnable.

I was looked at with some suspicion when I asked for my refund (although he hardly looked at me at all). ‘Why?’ was the response. Not the same gentleman, but this guy’s demeanour suggested torpor and despair were company policy at the CDWoK. I explained my predicament and, without a word, the man eviscerated the packaging and began about trying to fix the computer upon its mount. He did so, but not without some struggle, and then failed completely in removing it again. There was no question of not returning my money now. He even offered a hint of a smile as he handed me back the cash.

The CDWoK allows you to ‘meet the staff’ on its website, although only about half have been allocated facial imagery. I can’t therefore identify the guy who sulked his way through showing me the Northwave glasses, but can tell you that the man who barely uttered a word whilst gradually providing me with a refund is in fact the Store Manager. Way to go, boss man.

I would like to point out that all my other dealings with the Cycling Dealership West of Kingston have been reasonably positive. I allude to the sullen few not to put people off of shopping there (if you can indeed deduce the company in question) but merely to entertain the hypothesis that these people might be representative of the industry as a whole.

So are they? A prerequisite for the job is certainly a fondness for cycling, although not necessarily of the road orientated kind, and the CDWoK do co-sponsor a modest cycling team. On the other hand, in-store there’s almost as much emphasis towards triathlons, and those online profiles point to sporting interests amongst the staff stretching well beyond that – skiing, football, even golf.

I suspect it’s the people who shop in the CDWoK who might feasibly be more indicative of the scene. I’ve witnessed a few horror shows, too: customers discussing, in great detail, their cycling exploits with the staff, whilst stood in full racing gear, helmets on and everything. But you get berks like that in all walks of life, don’t you?

I decided against re-investing in another computer. As much I was enthralled by the idea, it was an expense I could not presently uphold – maybe something for the future.

And I finally sold my Uvex helmet – for £25, making a loss on the postage I’d paid to receive it – and was determined to sort out a replacement as soon as possible. This I had almost done when I’d identified the Louis Garneau Le Tour or the Kask K50 as potential new helmets, but held firm with my policy that required that I’d have to sell before I could buy. My budget set at £50, I’d had no luck finding the Louise Garneau Sharp or Giro Savant in any sale, on-line or otherwise, so had given up on them. The Louise Garneau Le Tour retailed at £44 from Evans Cycles in what seemed to be an exclusive deal. The Kask K50 cost more but could be found on-line for roughly the same. On balance, the Louise Garneau helmets had proved to offer a more reliable fit, so I bought the Le Tour – in all black because the white version was marred with silver streaks. Christ knows how much it costs to make these polystyrene head garments, but I suspect very little.

 

  

 

I hesitate to incorporate the cost of footwear into my budget for I’ve not procured anything cycling specific. Instead I’ve bought a pair of Nike Circuit trainers. Their sole is shallow and fairly stiff. They are narrow fitting, low set, and the front is shaped in accordance with my toe clips. And they are white. But I shall say no more about them because they’re not strictly relevant here.

That’s it: I have my tools needed for the job and can finally start unsubscribing from all the cycling websites that flood my email account with homogenous offers day in and day out. I shouldn’t complain because they’ve helped me to equip myself at a time of financial strain. I don’t really feel like I’ve had to compromise on quality either. There’s nothing I regret buying and little I would do differently. The Mavic jacket in particular has proved invaluable, and you wouldn’t believe how happy those Zefel toe straps make me.

So behold my chart of accounts:

 

Bought Items	Make/Model	Source	Value/£	Cost/£
Bike	Carlos	Vintage Bike Cave	295.00	295.00
Jersey	Descente - Spira	Ebay †	15.88	15.88
Jersey	Solo - Heuvel	Ebay †	70.00	29.50
Bottle cage	Elite - Ciussi	Halfords (Twickenham)	7.99	7.99
Water bottle	Elite - Cincio	Halfords (Twickenham)	5.99	5.99
Cycling shorts	Altura - Cadence	Evans (gift)	24.99	24.99
Gloves	Altura - Classic	Evans (Waterloo)	16.99	16.99
Saddle bag	Ortlieb - Micro	Unknown (gift)	18.50	18.50
Co2 inflator	M: Part - Micro	Bicycle (Richmond)	10.99	10.99
Jacket	Mavic - Sprint	Ribble (on-line) *	110.00	51.26
Socks	Mavic - Race	Cycle Surgery (Fulham)	8.99	7.19
Jersey	Caisse D'Epargne	Ebay †	N/A	15.22
Jersey	Carlos-Galli	Ebay †	N/A	12.49
Front light	Lezyne - Femto	Evans (Kingston)	12.99	12.99
D-lock	Kryptonite - Mini	Tredz (on-line) *	44.99	29.54
Bike	Romani	Vintage Bike Cave	475.00	445.00
Helmet	Uvex - i-vo	Ebay †	44.99	29.99
Jersey	Santini - La Vie Claire	Prendas Ciclismo (on-line) *	49.99	49.99
Gloves	Mavic - Espoir	Hargroves (on-line) *	20.00	13.30
Eyewear	Foster Grant - Tolerance	Foster Grant (on-line) *	26.00	17.42
Leather toe straps	Zefal - Christophe	Cycle Store (on-line) *	11.99	9.99
Cycling shorts	Santini	Prendas Ciclismo (on-line)	39.95	25.00
Socks x 2 pairs	Mavic - Century	Slane Cycles (on-line) †	22.00	18.98
Helmet	Louis Garneau - Le Tour	Evans (Brentford)	44.99	44.99
Footwear	Nike - Circuit	Sports Direct	46.99	33.00
Sold/Returned Items
Jersey	Caisse D'Epargne	Ebay	N/A	-41.53
Jersey	Carlos-Galli	Ebay	N/A	-10.00
Bike	Carlos	Private	-295.00	-325.00
Gloves	Altura - Classic	Evans	-16.99	-16.99
Helmet	Uvex - i-vo	Gumtree	-44.99	-25.00
TOTAL			1,068.22	823.66

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† Amount paid includes the cost of post & packaging

As you can see, I’ve made a decent saving, be it through purchasing on-line, selling items at a profit, or finding things in various sales. I’ve actually spent less than £823.66, as many of my acquisitions were gifts, but there seemed little point reflecting that in the figures because the point of the chart of accounts is to portray a sense of the savings there are to be had.
            The outlay on accoutrements alone is £394.49, but bought new or undiscounted they would have cost me £546.23. This isn’t including the articles I bought and sold or had refunded, or the trainers: it represents the cost of the accessories alone and the clothing I kept. This should give you some sort of idea of what anyone new to cycling might need to spend after they’ve shelled out for a bike.
            Of course, some might argue that I’ve not bought enough. I’ve figured that three jerseys, three pairs of socks and two pairs of cycling shorts will suffice, but it probably won’t – I regularly have to employ the use of regular socks and I’m constantly washing the rest. A computer might be deemed essential for anyone who’s serious about cycling, and I’ve certainly not invested in the attire necessary for winter riding.
            There are other costs, too, that I’ve not counted. I recently spent £10.19 on some SIS ‘GO ENERGY’ carbohydrate drink mix (or EPO, as I’ve taken to calling it – it’s potent stuff) with a free 800 ml bidon thrown in, and I will surely be buying further supplements to take during the course of the London to Brighton. But if I included consumables such as these, where would I stop? Should I factor in the extra eggs and mushrooms I’ve been buying to make large omelettes, or the almonds and cashew nuts to eat in-between meals? Nor did I factor in the expense of the services rendered at Crown Cycles, for such costs are on-going and part and parcel of owning a bike.
            You should get the picture. You should understand that you could kit yourself out for under a grand – that’s presuming you’d rather a half decent second-hand steel bicycle. If you’d prefer to ride a new (or carbon framed) bike then obviously this equation doesn’t quite work, but the cost of accessories could remain about the same. Look into it.